I Sold My Birthright, Twice Pt 2

In Part 1 I capture my conversation with God. I talk about how I presented to Him a fast and how I knew when He accepted it. While on this fast I was tempted through my own desires and I was tested about keeping my word. I failed on both levels more than once. The Lord showed Himself mightily through His Grace and Mercy. He kept presenting me with moments to pass until I caught the revelation and the lesson embedded in the test.

Part 2 reflects the continuation of bringing this lesson to light from spiritual to manifesting in the natural. My conversation continues and picks up where it progressed.

Now let me get closer to you through fasting. Amen. At the beginning I wanted to be with Him.  I didn’t understand how but now I do.  

 If I would have kept going, I too, would have lied over soup as Jacob lied to Isaac over venison soup.

It’s getting deep.  Real deep.  

My conversation with God:

  • God says, “I lied to my father.” 
  • I ask, “Lord what did I lie to my natural father about?”
  • I told my natural father that I was going silent on this fast. But I have been speaking to people. Thank you, Jesus.
  • I told my natural father that I was doing no food no water.  Thank you, Jesus.

My natural father represents God, my Father, in this scenario so I apply everything to God, as my Father to see where have I lied to God.  

  • I ask, “Lord what have I lied to you about?”
  • I am reminded that: I lied to God about saying I am going to fast these weeks with no food and water and I ate and drank for four days straight.

On Thursday, December 13, I ate meat. Steak. Trying to convince the Father (like Jacob did to Isaac) like I was still fasting although I was eating after 6 pm, which was not a part of the vow that I made with Him to fast. I offered to Him a fast of no food or water. He honored it by making my bowels soft so that I would not be constipated or have hard stools when I ended my fast. To God be the glory. 

I thank God for many chances. He speaks two and three times. 

I have repented in the name of Jesus amen. 

This thing manifested.  It gets juicy after this.

I hit a buck. A male deer on November 8, 2018.

Venison is meat and I ate meat on Thursday night and became nauseous and got a headache. I asked God was it high blood pressure or diabetes. Nope. It was because I was lying to to God. With meat. Remember, Jacob lied to his father over Venison soup. Venison is deer meet.  

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This morning I bought a plane ticket to go get my car back from Buick. They repaired it. My SUV has been repaired and released for me to go get amen. Thank you Jesus. I received my breakthrough and release before I knew how or what I even went through.  The Lord woke me up and led me online to purchase my ticket and get back what I rightfully gave over to the enemy.  I handed it to him.  He did not steal it.  He walked right up to me with some soup and I handed it over to him.  Now I am going back to get what is mine.  AUTHORITY.

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SIDENOTE: That deer split my car down the middle.  Nothing affected the driver side.  He came for me but couldn’t touch me.  But God…
  • That deer stood as tall as my suv. 
  • That’s how big this lie was. To God. And it stopped me in my tracks. 
  • That lie has held me up. Cost me money from renting cars and taking Lyft. 
  • Cost me my relationship with Christ, my Father. 
  • A lie. 
  • This lie was that big and cost me my relationship with the Father because a liar will not tarry in His sight. 

I could not get close to see the Father face to face because I lied. Had I known the scriptures I would have seen that this was a tactic of the enemy. SOUP. Still till this day. SOUP.   

Then this week a lie starting out. A lie to my natural father of no food and no water.  A real lesson learned. 

That is why that deer was so big and tall and stopped me in my tracks.

But God is a redeemer. He loves us. So He allowed me to kill what was hindering me. I killed that deer when I hit it. It tried to kill me. My lie manifested and what the devil thought for evil God has used to educate me so that I will not perish for lack of knowledge. Thank you Jesus. 

I killed all soups that the enemy has used for my family. My family not being able to fast is over. That trick and lie of the enemy is defeated. It cost me money and time and face time with God. No more.  The fact that I ate 2 soups means that the enemy used it twice in my family. Generational. 

It got me 2 years ago but I defeated it this year. For my family. Stealing and lying through soup is not our portion. My children will never suffer with fasting. It is easy to them. 

My parents can now fast in peace. With strength. Not being tempted of the enemy with Soup, a scheme he thought of many years ago. 

God is good. Amazing. 

A venison soup was used to lie to his father, Isaac, and soup was used for me to lie to my Father, God.  

And I hit a deer. My lie manifested and God kept me. 

Now I can go before the Father in Spirit and in Truth

Now my visitation with Him can happen. Now I am expecting. Now I have my breakthrough. I broke through that lie when I hit that deer and it did not kill me. God preserved me. 

 My breakthrough into the throne room. 

  • A liar cannot tarry in Gods sight.
  • My lies are done.
  • Torn down.
  • Done away with.
  • I can now approach the throne of God.
  • I now can see and expect my visitation(s). Everyday.
  • Angels. Angelic beings.
  • The Lord has been preparing me for this breakthrough and today I will meet my Savior face-to-face. 


  • Confess 
  • Repent
  • Forgive yourself.  Do not beat yourself about what you did Not know.
  • Read what His Word says.  He continually forgives His children.  
  • God knew what we would do when He created us.  He already forgave us.  Its included in His blood.  
  • Know who you are.  and BELIEVE it.  
  • Knowing whose we are allows us to walk with God- as Adam did. 
  • As Christ did……And Christ in us allows us to walk with Him today.

Because I Iied

  • Opened the door for high blood pressure. 
  • Now becoming the salt of the earth was now turning salt against me. 
  • Nauseous – not wanting to eat meat or seasoning. 
  • Thinking God is saying I’m vegan or vegetarian – not the way I felt after eating meat. 
  • Heart disease
  • Headaches 
  • Pressure in head behind ears 
  • Feel like head is about to explode
  • Pain pills 
  • Speaking lies over self. Speaking death over self about how I feel 
  • Cursing myself. 
  • Repeating story to others confirming lies of self. 
  • Having others agree with me about me. 
  • Now delivered. I now renounce affects of the lie. 
  • Closing portals and gateways. 
  • Closing doors 
  • Renouncing lies spoken of myself 
  • I can now tarry in God’s sight because I am no longer a liar. 
  • Speaking life over me 
  • Speaking opposite of everything I said about me negative 
  • I come out of agreement with those who agreed with me. 

When Jacob was no longer known as a liar his name changed. An angel appeared that he wrestled with and changed his name before blessing him. 

The Lord on yesterday showed me my name LaToya. I love Alwonza because it is different and unique. LaToya means victory. Triumphed. He showed me my new name yesterday. This morning He released me to go get my car. Tonight He revealed what held me up from His presence-a lie on Him. 

Today I took a nap on my pillow as Jacob did and saw God standing at the top of the ladder and angels ascending and descending. 

As I type this I am meditating on Mark 6:41 with reference to Matthew 26:26. God came Himself to feed much people and his disciples. He moved with compassion. 

He too has moved with compassion on me to reveal to me what was separating me from Him. He wants me in his presence. His compassion on my requests to be in his presence has caused Him to come himself in me. I am broken. Fasting. Eating with Him is spiritual food. Manna in me from His tabernacle in me. His dwelling place in me. Which is reading His word.

His word is good to me. 

He has moved with compassion towards me as I looked up to heaven to commit my body as a living sacrifice. His body that dwells in me as a living sacrifice. And God the Father honored it. And broke me even more and multiplied Himself in me. Multiplied Himself in me looks like more of Him. More of His characteristics. I traded my lies to Him and He took them and replaced them with truth. The Holy Spirit. His Holy Spirit. Galatians 5:23. To bear more of His fruit. No more lies. I gained truth. And compassion. Compassion for myself. Growing in Him that I have more compassion for His people that He may be seen more in me. Through me.

Giving me compassion. Showing me compassion makes me want to show compassion to others. As He did it for me I will do it for others.  To much is given much is required. 

This compassion that I was shown is to feed His people. People who followed Him like sheep without a shepherd. I will teach many things then send them away with bread. Bread from me. Bread from above. Broken. Broken through faith after looking up to the Father. 

Miracles. This faith is miracles. 

Compassion = faith = miracles. 

Faith is a fruit of the spirit. Obtained through brokenness. Humbleness. Compassion. 

Today Prophet Shepherd Bushiri prayed that we receive the Spirit of Faith. 12/14/2018. 1 Corinthians 12 faith. 

The Spirit of Faith. A Power gift. Faith miracles and healing. Faith is the dominant of the three. 

Isiah 29:24. They that erred in spirit. I erred but God had a scripture for me. I came into understanding. And He counted it as faith. Isaiah 29:22. God redeemed Abraham. Jacob shall not be ashamed. Jacob was a liar. I was a liar and neither of us shall be ashamed. Isaiah 29:23. When I see God’s children and the work of Him through my hands, I shall sanctify His name and fear the God of Israel (Jacobs new name). Amen. 

God again gets all of the glory. Even when the enemy thought he was ahead and thought perhaps he got one of God’s children ensnared and bound and captured through and with a lie. God said not so. And God gets all of the glory.

Out of the lie came compassion with a reward of the gift of faith. 

God gets all of the glory. Amen. And amen. 

Today is 3/13/2019, Wednesday. On Sunday past my Pastor declared that we walked into the Supernatural. The Supernatural requires Faith. You have to believe what you see. This blog post was written on 12/24/2019 but I was not able to post it until now. I thank God for His timing.